Gecko weaving

I always have to learn things the hard way.  

I started my Gecko...and once again I have decided I hate following a pattern.  

I prefer to let the yarn and the loom breathe and take life under my slow and steady hands.  I have never been disappointed this way.  Somehow, I just keep thinking I should be able to do pictorials...I often feel that because I can't (or more to the point don't) enjoy doing pictorials I am an inferior fiber artist.  

I feel the same way about drawing.  I keep thinking that I should be able to do photo realism.  

My friend Carol says not many people can just pick up a pencil and let their imagination do what mine does. Not many who listen to their inner voice without censorship and get acceptable results, and sometimes great results.  That not many people with no formal education can pick up a few balls of yarn and create the things I do.  That it is a gift, as I rarely, if ever, have bought yarn and said I will do this design in these colors in this size and accomplished this to the end result.  I have always been on a budget and have used what I have on hand, I even went to the cotton fields and a man gave me a whole trunk of ginned cotton when I found buying the roving expensive.  I have always been encouraged, but I have also always had to husband my supplies.  

Somehow it has always worked out.  I have produced nice pieces within these limits.  Persevered against limited education and funds.  Am I an artist???  Some days I am just not sure.  Guess today is one of those.